Heart not free

And though he had got over her, he could never outgrow her love. The thought of her warmth still made him comfortable. Maybe he had convinced himself that she will never be his, but he can never get rid of her impression on him.

Now he looked for her in every girl he met. His heart yearned for the same spark again. And this is probably the worst place to be. The person ready to love but heart not free.



He lay on his bed, behind the locked door of his room. Face down and in tears. The lights were out and it was nearing midnight. His weeping was the only sound heard, other than that of the ticking clock. His body was getting warmer and he was perspiring. But this didn’t seem to affect him. Thoughts about his fight with his parents preoccupied his mind. They had insulted him again. He had done badly in another test and they thought he was good for nothing. This was not the first time this had happened. Every such fight was followed by a storm of escape and suicidal thoughts in his mind. Every time he decided against them by convincing himself that his parents are right in their place. But not this time. Their words had pierced his heart.

“I’m not killing myself,” he said to himself. “Suicide is for the weak of the heart! And I’m not weak.”

He was a young man with warm blood. In an emotional outburst, his adolescent mind made an impulsive decision. He pushed his body upright and switched on the lights. First, he washed his face . Next, he opened his wardrobe and pulled out a suitcase. He started filling it with his belongings. His actions gave away his intentions. He put on his hoodie and stuffed his pockets with his phone and his bike keys. He was ready to go! He thought of leaving a note but cancelled the idea as nobody would care anyway. Making sure all were asleep, he left his room and the house. His unsuspecting parents were probably dreaming about their son’s bright future.

It was raining outside. The chill made him shiver. Rain drops had gathered on his bike and the breeze had made the handles cold. Undeterred, he took out his bike and headed to a specific destination. His body trembled when its warmth came in contact with the frozen handles. The rain drops hit his face as he rode. But he seemed to be oblivious to the weather.

Brakes were applied under a building in a housing complex.  It was midnight now. Reaching out for his phone in his pocket, he dialled a number. A sweet female voice said hello from the other side.

“Please can you come down for five minutes?  I’m waiting,” he said. 

“Now? My parents would not send me”, she said. 

“Just this one last time ,” he said.

“Umm..Okay,” she said confused.

The sweet voice was of his love. His one and only crush ever. He liked her a lot. But she did not reciprocate the feelings and had rejected his confession. They were great friends though. She came down and stood below the construction of the building to avoid the rain. Seeing her, his face automatically lit up. He got off his bike and brushed his hair with his fingers, approaching her. He greeted her with a warm smile and just stood looking at her face. Her face left him spellbound every time.

Little annoyed, she said,” What is it?!”

He began in his husky tone,

“This is probably the last time I will ever see you. So I HAVE to say all this. I like you and I like you a lot. And I’ll probably never like anyone else again. But I also know that you don’t have the same feelings for me. So can I get a farewell hug before I leave, so that I can live with its memories for the rest of my life?”

Unable to understand the gravity of the situation, she carelessly said,”Where will you go stupid? “

She hugged him tight and he hugged her tighter.

The hug made his smile ever more charming. And with the charming smile, he waved goodbye to her. And leaving behind all his life, he faded into the oblivion.

Too late

She liked me and I think I liked her too.
But none of us had the guts to speak out the truth.
We kept meeting everyday, We kept seeing each other.
Everyone else in the room could see it, everyone else but us.
I think I had made up my mind a couple of times,
But backed out.
I think even she tried,
But couldn’t.
Friends kept insisting and I kept delaying.
I don”t understand what was so tough.
Just three words…
Time was fleet and we didn’t meet.
Until one fine day,
She came to me.
I had decided to say it today.
I grabbed her hand and fell to my knees.
Asked her,’I love you and will do it always. Will you be mine forever?
With equal love she looked into my eyes,
Tears rolled down her cheeks.
Too late‘, she said as she pulled her hand out of mine,
Her ring came out in the motion.

Why girls? Why?

You keep looking at him in the class, but when he looks back, you look away.

You keeping talking about him to your girl friends, but never talk to him.

You adore him more than the world, but don’t show it to him.

You keep stalking him online, but don’t reply a single message of his.

When he comes to talk to you, you show attitude.

When he doesn’t, you pray he does.

You go to all parties just to see him, but don’t attend the one he invites you to.

You love him more than yourself, but expect him to know it by birth.

You be a bitch, expecting his attention.

Why girls? Why?

The Noise of Love

The night was dark. The world was asleep. But not him. He sat at his desk in the corner of his room. The table lamp switched on. The rest of the room was dark. And silent. Other than the faint classic rock music that played in the background. There was a book open before him. It did not interest him particularly. Nor did it get his precious attention. He seemed to be occupied. And anxious. In deep thought. Suddenly a there was buzz. Followed by a beep. And he seemed to panic. He picked up the device which had caused the noise and stared at the screen. ‘Love’ flashed on the screen. In an impulsive set of actions, he stroked the device several times and tapped it in the end and kept it back. Patiently waiting for the next noise of love.